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Now that my first pro race is behind me, I am able to look back and realize I have a lot to learn.  Most of these lessons I have learned the hard way during my first race.  It all started on Tuesday, about a week and a half before the big race...

I went to track practice with the Playmakers Racing Team like I usually do.  I was excited for the workout, we were doing mile repeats in a neighborhood and any time I can do mile repeats and avoid the track is a good workout!  I warmed up with the girls and got ready to work.  The first mile was a little hot and I noticed I was a little more fatigued than I normally would be for that effort.  No matter, on to the next mile!  At the end of the second mile, I looked at my friend Kelly and said "something's wrong."  It was hard to breath, my chest felt tight.  Kelly cautioned me to be careful and I promised I would, so we went on to the third mile.  Halfway through, I knew I was in trouble.  I couldn't breath, my chest was aching, my head was pounding and my legs felt weak.  I pushed through all of that, a seriously bad habit of mine, and finished the mile wheezing and coughing.  I couldn't believe it, was I seriously having an asthma attack?  I've had asthma all my life, usually classified as mild persistent asthma.  I take my Singulair pill and my steroid inhaler and go on with my life, never even considering my asthma to be a problem.  But there it was.  And I'm the queen of denial. 

I took the next mile off and waited for my breathing to return to normal.  My chest was still tight, but I wasn't wheezing anymore, surely I could go another mile!  I jumped back into the group and ran another fast mile, but paid the price again.  The neighborhood was spinning in front of me and I could hear the soft wheezing in my chest.  I finally admitted something might be wrong and decided to sit out the remainder of the mile repeats.  I didn't have my rescue inhaler on me because my asthma was under control, no problem!  I jogged back to Playmakers with the team, struggling to breath at the easy pace, but convincing myself everything was fine.  My inhaler was in the car, I would take it a few times and in the morning I would be good as new!

I was not good and I was certainly no where near "new."  I woke up feeling like a truck had rammed right into my chest.  I was coughing and struggling to breath, even walking across the room left me tired and out of breath!  That morning was the first time when I realized I was not okay.  And then I started to get scared, wondering what I had done.  I spent the day at work calling my doctor and puffing on my inhaler every hour or so.  I grew frustrated while trying to interview patients because after a few sentences I was forced to pause and catch my breath.  The earliest I could get in was the next morning, so I focused on my work and tried to stay calm.  And of course I did my usual race week workouts. 

The next morning I waited patiently for my doctor, assuming he would say I'm very healthy, I sound great and good luck at my race!  He listened to my breathing for a long time.  Then he stepped back and told me I had crackles in the base of my lungs and rales in the upper lobes.  I stared at him and asked "are you serious?"  He was very serious.  I had fluid in my lungs which was making it very difficult to breath and I would need to be started on oral steroids right away.  This was so not happening.  Dallas was in just over a week!  My first pro race!  And I had tried running through an asthma attack and filled my lungs with fluid.  Awesome. 

The week leading up to Dallas was pretty hectic.  Oral steroids are prohibited by the US Anti-Doping Agency unless medically necessary.  If a physician feels an athlete needs to be on a prohibited medication, the athlete is required to fill out an application for a Therapeutic Use Exemption and send in all sorts of medical records to prove why the medication is necessary.  After lots of running around and faxing paperwork and medical records, I received my TUE, meaning I could still race in Dallas without breaking any rules.  I also spent the week convincing myself I would be fine, steroids cure everything!  My dad and I joked about calling Lance Armstrong for doping advice and my husband joked about "roid rage."  It was easy to put any worries in the back of my mind and focus on getting my usual race week workouts done and packing for Dallas.

Then it was Friday!  The day had arrived!  I landed in Dallas late on Friday night and met up with my friend Abby, an amazing pro triathlete who is from Grand Rapids, and her husband Ross.  They had invited me to travel and stay with them for the weekend. 

The next morning we woke to some very cold weather.  After eating my fill of Texas-shaped waffles, we drove to the race hotel and started planning our day-before-the-race workouts.  After discovering my bike was having issues with the rear brake, Abby and I decided to do our run first.  As we were running part of the course, the wind started to pick up and we felt wisps of very cold air brush past us.  Then it started to sprinkle and then it started to rain!  Yikes!  The cold front was moving in!  We finished our run and headed back up to the hotel, fingers crossed that my bike would be in better shape.  It took Ross a bit longer, but eventually he was able to get the back brake together enough so it would be able to brake, which was really important because the transition is at the bottom of a very steep hill! 

We loaded the bikes into the rental car and drove out to the long out and back section of the bike course.  Abby and I started our workout heading into the wind, which was blowing somewhere around 25mph with a lovely cold mist.  I think we were going about 11mph and it was miserable.  Thank goodness for turn arounds!  I felt like the fastest woman alive!!  With our bike workout done, we found a cool little burrito place to eat lunch before heading back to the hotel.  It was about 52 degrees out and we needed to get our swim workout done.  The wind had made the water so choppy that the open swim was cancelled for age groupers, but still open to pros... left me with mixed feelings.  Pro perk number one: swimming in water consider unsafe for age group athletes... yay?  And it was really cold out!  But the water was a balmy 78 degrees and it felt glorious!  Well, as long as I was swimming with the wind. 

Next on the schedule was my first pro meeting.  It was held in a nice little conference room in the Hilton and I sat with Abby and another pro, Sierra Snyder, who we had met on the elevator.  I tried not to stare at all the pros, but it was hard!  Hunter Kemper was there and he was on the Wheaties box!  And Helle Frederickson was sitting across the aisle from me and Sara McLarty was sitting behind me with Jillian Peterson and Lauren Goss!  And Alicia Kaye was there too!  Okay, focus!  The race director went over the course and then the USAT official did a quick review of pro rules.  The one I was most worried about is a rule called infinite stagger.  A pro can never ride directly behind another athlete, even if they are 400 yards up, you always have to be a bit to one side.  That one can get really tough to follow when elite men, who were starting 4 minutes behind the pro women, pass a pro woman because the elite men are not following the infinite stagger rule.  But after the meeting I got the chance to chat more with Sierra, who is super nice, and talk to Alicia Kaye and Jillian Peterson.  I hope I didn't look too star struck! 

Abby, Ross and I drove the rest of the bike course after dinner and then found the most amazing little Italian diner to eat.  The pasta was amazing and the conversation even better!  I am very lucky to have the opportunity to ask Abby and Ross all the questions running through my head about pro racing and to have them supporting me.  Staying with them definitely helped to keep my nerves at bay and I was excited about growing our friendship.  After all the laughing and talking, I actually slept pretty well!

But in the morning the nerves slammed into my belly full force.  I began to wonder what in the world am I doing here?!  I'm not the same caliber as these girls!  Some text messages from my husband and my dad reminded me that no one handed me a pro card for free, it was earned.  I had earned my way to this race.  Abby and I went through our usual pre-race routine with a run warm up and then dressed in as many layers as we could to head down to transition. 

It was neat to be in a separate transition area and with only 3 bikes on each rack there is a lot of room to spread out all my gear.  But it also made me more nervous!  I tried not to look around at their bikes or really cool gear, and kept my head down and focused on my own transition area.  I went through my list for set up as calmly as I could, saying to myself over and over "just race your race and be proud of yourself." 

Abby and I had been hoping to get a swim warm up in, but with all the rain over night the water temperature had dropped to a chilly 69 degrees, which still wasn't cold enough for pros to wear wetsuits.  The cut off for pros is 68 degrees and I didn't want to get too cold before the race started.  Some of the other pro women told Abby they had warmed up in the hotel's pool, so I said why not!  After a quick swim in the pool, Abby and I headed inside to get as dried off as possible.  That was when the nerves hit me really bad.  For a moment I couldn't even speak, I was so nervous.  Looking back, I'm still not really sure why I was so nervous, but the idea of racing pro for the very first time was scary and very daunting.  Abby gave me a big hug and Ross told me I would do great, just have fun!  I took a deep breath, pushed the nerves back and followed them out to the swim start.

The water still felt warm and I was anxious to just get this thing started!  The pro men were announced and then they were off.  I jumped into the water, made sure my goggles were snug and heard the announcer say "and give a big welcome to Samantha Kennedy, in her first pro race!"  My heart lifted at that, how exciting was this!  I scrambled up to the start line and before I knew it the horn was blowing and we were off!

The pro women start FAST.  There was a flurry of kicking, arms flying, water spraying and before long I had no idea where I was going, I was just trying to follow the splashing.  I'm not sure what happened, but I got stuck toward the back of the group.  I stayed close on the heels of another girl, using her as a guide because I was having trouble spotting the buoys.  After the first turn I started to feel a small ache in my chest.  And it hit me.  I wasn't recovered from the asthma attack.  I stayed calm and continued to follow the two girls ahead of me.  We hit another buoy and turned back to shore and I swam hard to keep up.  Suddenly there were kayakers in front of us, yelling and waving for us to go back.  We had turned to early, there was another buoy.  I accepted that my swim would be much slower than I was used to and did my best to stay close to two girls as we got back on course.  As I neared the swim exit, my calves and quads started to cramp up.  Stupid asthma.  It is hard to get enough oxygen when swimming in choppy, cold water!  I fell on my first attempt to climb up the stairs, but managed to get a better foot hold the second time and ran up to transition as quickly as my frozen feet could carry me.

It was hard to come into transition and see the other two girls grabbing their bikes and leaving mine alone on the rack, but I was determined to have a good bike!  I pulled off my speedsuit, grabbed my bike and ran to the bike mount.  Shortly after the bike mount, the course goes up a very steep hill which left me puffing for breath.  I jammed my frozen feet into my shoes and tried to calm my breathing, but the air was cold and my chest was aching.  The bike seemed very long that day.  Every time I tried to push my pace, I started coughing and wheezing.  I tried not to get too frustrated and focused instead on doing the best I could.  Up ahead, I could still see one pro female and at the turn around I was happy to see that I wasn't too far back.  Certainly it was a respectable distance!  And seeing Cameron Dye fly past with Hunter Kemper hot in pursuit brought a smile to my face.  I saw Abby and silently cheered for her.  Then I was turning around and thankful to be heading back toward transition. 

The last few miles were into the wind, which had picked up during the bike.  I focused on my cadence and tried to stay strong.  My cough was now a constant companion, making it difficult for me to drink any fluid.  At least it wasn't hot out!  I was a little surprised when I saw the hotel below and realized I had arrived at transition.  I quickly slipped of my shoes, no easy task since I couldn't feel my feet anymore, and clamped down on my back brake as hard as I could.  I was going too fast as I came to the dismount line, but my back brake wouldn't go any tighter!  I jumped off my bike, stumbled, but stayed on my feet.  I ran to my rack and fumbled with my helmet, a little shocked to see a pro female heading out of transition.  I pulled on my shoes and headed out of transition and up the steep hill, intent on chasing her down. 

I don't think the run course had more than 50 feet of flat to it, it rolled up and down constantly.  But I took strength in that, I had been working hard on hills during the season and felt strong running up hill.  I caught the woman I had spotted at transition on an uphill and said a breathy "good job" as I pushed hard up the hill.  From that point on, I narrowed my focus to my cadence.  One foot in front of the other, going quick, quick, quick, up and down the hills.  The miles passed by.  I had no idea what my pace was, I didn't want to look at my watch.  My breathing continued to worsen.  I hit mile 5 and knew I didn't have much left.  I could hear the wheezing and my chest was aching, it felt so tight!  My legs had gown stiff and my head was starting to pound.  But I only had a mile left.  Cadence.  I made my entire world about my cadence and ignored everything else. 

The cheering grew louder and I looked up to see that I was running down the finishing stretch.  I was gasping for breath now and felt like my chest was going to crumble in, but I pushed hard for the finish line.  I crossed and heard the announcer say my name and that I had just finished my first pro race and my heart swelled with pride!  I fell to my knees and tried to breathe, but I couldn't.  Nothing was getting through my lungs.  I began to panic, but Abby and Ross were there and I heard someone saying it was okay, just breath.  Eventually someone found a medic and they helped carry me to the med tent, something I am very familiar with!  I was able to take a few puffs of my inhaler and quiet the wheezing in my chest.  More puffs on my inhaler follow and they gave me some oxygen, which helped my headache and made the tingling sensation in my mouth go away.  Much better!  Hands shaking from all the albuterol, I proudly hung the medal around my neck.  It had been a tough race, but I had finished.  I had finished my first pro race! 

So what lessons have I learned?  First of all, running through an asthma is stupid.  Especially less than 2 weeks before a race.  At that point, the hay is in the barn!  No one workout is going to make you, but I found out the hard way that it can certainly break you.  Or at least make your race much more difficult than it needs to be.  It is important to be smart in the 2 weeks leading up to a big race because injuries or asthma attacks are tough to recover from and take time. 

My second lesson is to learn the swim course better.  I had been so focused on my nerves and being star struck and scared of the field I was racing in that I didn't even look at the swim course!  I just assumed I could follow other women and I would be fine.  So learn the swim course!  Count the buoys!  And if you're uncertain of where you are going, take a few extra seconds to stop and figure it out.  Taking a few seconds to be certain where the next buoy is located is much better than wasting minutes swimming in the wrong direction.

My third lesson is to be prepared for the weather.  On race morning it was 50 degrees and I learned very quickly that my toes will freeze!  I saw all the other pro women had little toe covers on their shoes.  Definitely an important piece of gear to buy!  And it is good to be prepared with some extra warm up pants and warm tops. 

And fourth, and most importantly, is to enjoy and cherish every race.  I was so nervous and scared on race morning that I almost missed out on enjoying my experience!  The asthma attack forced me to slow down and change my outlook on the race.  I was pushing my body as hard as I could, I was racing in my first pro race and I had no choice but to be proud of myself.  I wish I had been thinking that before the race!  It certainly would have made my morning less stressful! 

Now it is finally time for a little off season.  I'm excited for the off season!  I take 2 weeks and just do whatever sounds good.  There is some structure to my two weeks, my coach sends me some "rules" that give me a loose guideline to follow.  But mostly I take two weeks and do whatever sounds good whenever it sounds good!  It is also a good time for reflection and I fill out an end of season evaluation.  What did I improve on the most?  What do I want to improve on for next year?  What races would I like to do next year?  What are some goals for next year?  The 2 weeks off are also a time to dream.  Last year during my 2 weeks off, I told my coach Barb that my shoot-for-the-moon goal was to earn a pro card.  I never truly thought it would happen, but that is what dreaming is for.  Make some goals, rest, and then go for it.  You never know what could happen!  You might meet Alicia Kaye, you might make an amazing friend and you might make that goal happen!  I can't wait to see what happens next year :)

Happy Training!